On my last visit to Washington to lobby Barney Frank I took him to one of the many DC strip clubs that were recommended to me by friend Nancy Pelosi. Mr. Frank and I were both delighted by the high caliber of the dancers – they were attractive, attentive, and skilled at their craft – which prompted us to muse about the state of adult entertainment in the capital.
It’s a rare day that you’d go into one of the best Washington DC strip clubs and would be there in the absence of any prominent senator, congressman, or politician. Lobbyists like myself know that the best way to a congressman’s agenda is through his – you know – and so we make sure that all of their special treatment is charged to our account, which the house generally keeps down-low.
At more seedy DC strip clubs you may not find prominent politicians but in their place you’ll find many ranking bureaucrats in the city’s fast bureaucracy who – because of their status – are generally treated like VIPs. This VIP treatment doesn’t stop at just a few drinks, but generally falls into the category of the illegal – not that anyone’s complaining. If there’s anything that I’ve learned in my time as a lobbyist, it’s that actions are much more effective than words – wink-wink.